The Englishman steals 3 buns and puts them into his pockets and leaves. He says to the Irishman, “That took great skill and guile to steal those buns. The owner didn’t even see me.” The Irishman replied, “That’s just simple thievery, I’ll show you how to do it the honest way and get the same results.” The Irishman then proceeded ...
Some tourists in the Chicago Museum of Natural History are marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asks the guard, “Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?” The guard replies, “They are 73 million, four years, and six months old.” “That’s an awfully exact number,” says the tourist. “How do you know their age so precisely?” ...
When Bob found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. “I may look like just an ordinary ...
A kindergarten teacher is having her birthday and three of her students decided to bring her a gift. The first students was little Timmy and his dad owned a Candy Store. Timmy walked up to his teacher and handed her a nice little gift wrapped box The teacher thanked the student and told him, she wanted to see if she ...
A man was dining alone in a fancy restaurant and there was a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He had been checking her out since he sat down, but lacked the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly she sneezed, and her glass eye came flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reached out, grabbed it ...
An older white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday with his beautiful young girlfriend at his side The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, “I don’t think you understand, I want something very special.” At that statement, the jeweler went to his special ...
Every day Nasreddin went to beg for alms in the market, and people used to make fun of him by playing the following trick: They would show him two coins, one worth ten times more than the other, and Nasrudin would always choose the smaller coin. The story went round the whole province. Day after day, groups of men and ...
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for a half hour. Then a big trouble making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying The truck driver says, “Come on man, I was just joking. Here, ...