Hi Men’s Helpline, I really need your advice on a serious problem: I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs: If the phone rings and I answer, the caller hangs up; she goes out with the girls a lot. I try to stay awake to look out for her when ...
Husband and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, “And you are not good in bed either,” and storms out of the house. After sometime he realizes he was awful and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the ...
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?” The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell ...
An attorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of utmost urgency. An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor. “So, what is it?” grumbled the governor. “Judge Gerber has just died” said the attorney, “and I want to take his place.” The governor replied: “Well, it’s OK with me if ...
A Police Officer was waiting along the side of a highway waiting to catch speeding drivers. There weren’t as many violators this day as usual. The State Police Officer sees an old car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, “This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!” So he turns on his lights and pulls the ...
A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and went over to a cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fit a collar and leash, handed it to the customer, saying, “That’ll be $5000.” The customer paid and walked ...
A Spanish captain was walking on his ship when a soldier rushes to him and exclaims, “An enemy ship is approaching us!” The captain replies calmly, “Go get my red shirt.” The soldier gets the shirt for the captain. The enemy ship comes in and heavy rounds of fire are exchanged, the Spaniards win. The soldier asks, “Congrats sir, but ...
The head monk said, “You must take a vow of silence and can only say two words every three years.” The man agreed and after the first 3 years, the head monk came to him and said, “What are your two words?””Food cold!” the man replied. Three more years went by and the head monk came to him and said ...