… and every year Buddy would say, ‘Edna, I’d like to ride in that helicopter’ Edna always replied, ‘I know Buddy, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks’ One year Buddy and Edna went to the fair, and Buddy said, ‘Edna, I’m 85 years old If I don’t ride that helicopter, I might never ...
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed. ...
There was a Japanese man who came to London for sightseeing On the last day, he hailed a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, “Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!” After a while, a Toyota sped ...
Three writers, Al, Ben, and Carl, who were attending a writing convention, booked a room on the 75th floor of a hotel. When they arrived back at the hotel from the convention, the receptionist told them, “I’m terribly sorry, but the elevator is broken In the meantime, you will have to take the stairs.” Now, Al was a writer of ...
A very cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a supermarket. She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager to the security guard to the arresting officer who took her away. She complained and criticised everything and everyone throughout the process. When she appeared before the judge, the judge asked her what she had stolen from the store. The lady ...
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. ‘In honour of this holy season’ Saint Peter said, ‘You must each possess something that symbolises Christmas to get into Heaven.’ The man from England fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter He flicked it on ‘It represents a candle’, he said. ...
Carl had this one bad habit that had always disgusted Suzanne Lovely couple, but Carl had this one bad habit that had always disgusted Suzanne. Every morning, before getting out of bed, Carl would let out this thunderous, paint peeling f.rt. Poor Suzanne would just cringe. Over the years she had complained at Carl, ” You know Carl! One of ...
She thought of a plan to take him by surprise. One Friday she told the maid to take the day off and that night she went into the maid’s room, switched off all the lights and, in pitch darkness, slipped into the bed. Sure enough at midnight, there were footsteps and a figure opened the door and slipped into the ...