A woman who is constantly embarrassed by her husband falling asleep in church goes to the priest to ask for help. The priest says, “Look love, if he falls asleep again, poke him with this hat pin. I’ll nod to you as a signal to poke him.”. The woman agrees to the plan So Sunday rolls around and sure enough, ...
A wife arrived home after a long shopping trip, and was horrified to find her husband in bed with a young, lovely thing. Just as she was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words: “Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about. Driving home, I saw this young ...
The doctor said, “Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition which causes your testicles to press on your spine, and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.” Joe was ...
Marine Corp Officers get their pensions based on a strange test It was decided to offer some of them an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer or senior enlisted man who volunteered for retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points of his body. Those applying got to choose what ...
Would you mind telling me, Doctor,” Bob asked, “how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?” “Nothing is easier,” he replied “You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble If he hesitates, that puts you on the track.” “What sort of question?” “Well, you might ask him, ‘Captain Cook made three ...
Tears formed in his eyes as he thought about her seeing the wonders of nature through such innocent eyes. Suddenly she stopped and stared at the ground. The father went over to her to see what had captured her attention. He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating. “Daddy, what are those spiders doing?” she asked. “They’re mating,” her ...
A farmer goes out one day and buys a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. So the new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, “ok, old f.rt, time to retire.” The old rooster replies, “come on, you can’t handle ALL these chickens, look what it’s done to me. Can’t you just let me have the ...
When NASA was preparing for the Apollo project, some of the training of the astronauts took place on a Navajo reservation. One day, a Navajo elder and his son were herding sheep and came across the space crew. The old man, who spoke only Navajo, asked a question that his son translated. What are these guys in the big suits ...