Archives

Categories

Dear Staff It has been brought to the Managing Director’s attention that some ex-servicemen throughout the organisation have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their civilian work colleagues. … Due to complaints received from some employees who may have been easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated. We do, however, realise ...

There was this little boy about 12 years old walking down the sidewalk dragging a flattened frog on a string behind him. He came up to the doorstep of a house of ill repute and knocked on the door. When the Madam answered it, she saw the little boy and asked what he wanted. He said, “I want to have ...

A little boy opened the large old family Bible, and he looked with fascination at the ancient pages as he turned them one by one. He was still in Genesis when something fell out of the Bible. He picked it up and looked at it closely. It was a very large old tree leaf that had been pressed between the ...

A new York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him “What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?” The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, “A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street.” Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and after a ...

A policeman was interrogating 3 blondes who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognising a suspect, he shows the first blonde a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. “This is your suspect, how would you recognise him?” The first blonde answers, “That’s easy, we’ll catch him fast because he only has one eye!” The ...

Two women are chatting in an office. Woman 1: “I had sex last night, did you?” Woman 2: “Yes.” Woman 1: “Was it good?” Woman 2: “No, it was a disaster… my husband came home, ate his dinner in three minutes, got on top of me, finished having sex in five minutes, rolled over and fell asleep in two minutes. ...

A woman was waiting in the check-out line at a shopping center.  Her arms were laden with a mop and broom and other cleaning supplies. By her actions and deep sighs, it was obvious she was in an extreme hurry and was not happy about the slowness of the line. When the cashier called for a price check on a ...

The dentist pulls out a Novocain needle to give the man a shot, so he can extract the man’s tooth. ‘No way! No needles. I hate needles’ the patient said. The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man objects I can’t do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating to ...