There was this little guy sitting in a bar, drinking his beer, minding his own business when all of a sudden this great big dude comes in and — WHACK!! — knocks him off the bar stool and onto the floor. The big dude says, “That was a karate chop from Korea.” The little guy thinks “GEEZ,” but he gets ...
There was a poetry competition final with two contestants, a university student and an old country man. They each had 20 seconds to come up with a poem about Timbuktu. The student goes first and says “Across the desert sands, crossed a lonely caravan, men on camels two by two, destination Timbuktu.” The crowd goes wild cheering for the poem. ...
“Did God make you, Grandpa?” “Yes, God made me” the grandfather answered. A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, “Did God make me, too?” “Yes, He did,” the older man replied. For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her grandfather wondered what ...
Fellow shows up at work Monday morning with two black eyes. His boss, figuring the guy got in a fight at a bar asks him, “Where’d you get the shiners?” “Got ’em both in church yesterday.” “In church!?! How in the world did you manage to get two black eyes in church?” “Well, the preacher called a hymn and as ...
A husband and wife were very happy over the nine pound baby boy that was born to them. Mr. Brown who could not conceal his delight, called up the editor of a famous newspaper and reported that he had become the proud owner of a nine pound nugget of gold. The editor upon hearing seemingly extraordinary news, sent his star ...
Jennifer watched as the cashier rang up her purchases. “Cash, check or charge?” she asked, after folding the items Jennifer had bought. As Jennifer fumbled for her wallet, the cashier noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. “Do you always carry your TV remote with you?” the cashier inquired. “No,” she replied. “But my husband, Jeff, ...
A guy and a girl are lying in a dorm-room bed after just having sex.The guy lies on his side of the bed and rests. The girl rolls to her side of the bed and says to herself, “I finally did it! I’m no longer a virgin.” The guy overhears her talking to herself and asks, “Are you saying you ...
Before celebrating a baptism, the deacon approached the young father and said solemnly, “Baptism is a serious step. Are you sure you’re prepared for it?” “I think so,” the man replied. “My wife has made appetizers and we have a caterer coming to provide plenty of cookies and cakes for our guests.” “I don’t mean that,” the deacon replied. “I ...