Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each… The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them. The man bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further ...
An airline pilot was scheduled to take a flight from New York to Los Angeles. The weather was too bad in New York to allow his usual on time departure. The weather in New York finally cleared and the pilot asked for his departure clearance. He was very dismayed to hear that he had another delay due to the increased ...
A chap walks into a pub carrying two suitcases. He puts them down and orders a drink. As he pays the barman notices that he is wearing a large watch. ‘That’s a large watch’ says the barman (see I told you!) ‘This watch,’ says the man, ‘is the very latest in high tech gadgetry. It’ll tell you the time anywhere ...
A guy is driving somewhere in Tennessee. He is riding along and a hog runs into the street and gets hit. The man is shocked, so he gets out and calls the police. “Hi I need to report that I just hit a pig in the road.” He says nervously, unsure of what to do. The other person on the ...
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters “UFO” emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralysed with shock, his young attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank ...
For a gimmick intended to draw customers, the local Innkeeper put up a sign: “500 gold pieces to anyone who can make my horse laugh. But if ye cannot, ye owe ME 500 gold pieces.” After a couple young fools tried and lost, the legend grew, but few were interested in actually taking the wager. Business boomed as travellers flocked ...
A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard… The 6 year old asks, “You know what…? I think it’s about time we started learning to cuss”. The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, “When we go in for breakfast, I’m gonna say something with hell and you say ...
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was “something wrong” with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room. “He’s just lying there looking sick,” he told me. “I’m serious, Dad . Can you help?” I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One ...