The Little Johnny, his uncle, and a cat on a farm. So, a father comes home to Little Johnny one day and says that they’ll have to move for a while. He’s going out on a business trip and his mother is in hospital for a car accident, so Little Johnny has to stay with his uncle for a while. ...
An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of. He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head. He then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the corner ...
An elderly Texan went to Chicago and thought he would buy a new “city” outfit. He went into Marshall Fields and when asked by a sweet young woman if she could help him, he answered, “Yes ma’am. Ya see, I’m from Texas and I want to buy a complete city outfit.” Her eyes lit up as she asked, “Where would ...
An elderly couple had just learned how to send text messages on their cell phones. The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy. One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. She decided to send her husband a romantic text message and she wrote: “If you are sleeping, send ...
A couple bought themselves a squirrel pet. One night they went out for dinner and locked the squirrel in the closet. Later that night a thief broke into their house. The thief was in the process of stealing the couple’s valuables when he heard the couple’s car arriving home. The thief then immediately hid in the closet. The owners came ...
An elderly prost!tutes were riding around town with a sign on the top of their car that read: “Two ho0kers – $50.00.” A police officer, seeing the sign, pulled the old ladies over and advised that they will have to remove the sign or go to jail. Right about that time a minivan passed by with a sign on the ...
Two 90-year-old women, Rose and Barb, had been friends all of their lives. When it was clear that Rose was dying, Barb visited her every day. One day Barb said, “Rose, we both loved playing women’s softball all our lives, and we played all through High School. Please do me one favour: when you get to heaven, somehow you must ...
Ethel checked into a Motel on her 65th Birthday, she was lonely, a little depressed at her advancing age so decided to risk an adventure. She thought, “I’ll call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sensual massages. She looked through the phone book, found a full-page ad for a guy calling himself Tender ...