Yesterday afternoon, my Mother-in-law narrowly escaped injury when the aircraft she was piloting was forced to make an emergency landing in a rural area because of bad weather. The CAA (Civil Aviation Authority) issued a preliminary report, citing pilot error: The report stated that the absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. The FAA ...
There once was a farmer who was raising three daughters on his own. He was very concerned about their well being and always did his best to watch out for them. As they entered their late teens the girls dated, and on this particular evening all three of his girls were going out on a date. This was the first ...
Four, surgeons were sitting around on lunch break, discussing what kinds of people they like to operate on. The first surgeon said, “I like operating on librarians. When you open them up, everything is in alphabetical order”. The second surgeon said, “I like operating on accountants. When you open them up, everything is numbered and organized.” The third surgeon said, ...
A farmer’s only donkey ran away in the forest. He packed up a few days ration and ventured into the jungle to find his animal. He searched and he searched but he couldn’t find it, so he decided to retire for the night. He climbed up a tree, tied himself to the trunk so he doesn’t fall down. Just as ...
The young male racehorse came from a long line of winners and did wonderfully in time trials. However, in actual races, he proved a little too romantic, and could never quite bring himself to pass a mare. So one day the trainer went to him and told him he’d have to be castrated. The young horse, knowing that it was ...
Ethel and Mabel, two elderly widows, were watching the folks go by from their park bench. Ethel said, “You know, Mabel, I’ve been reading this ‘S*x and Marriage’ book and all they talk about is ‘mutual org@sm’. ‘Mutual org@sm’ here and mutual org@sm’ there – that’s all they talk about. Tell me, Mabel, when your husband was alive, did you two ever have ...
A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoebox in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about. For all of ...
A girl is about to tie the knot and is watching her mother bake biscuits in the kitchen. “Mom?” she asks. “How do you keep Dad so happy after all these years of marriage?” The mother promptly throws a wad of biscuit dough on the floor, hikes up her dress, and squats down, picking the dough up with her privates. ...