A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. ...
A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a very long time. She went to the Western Wall to check it out and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site. She watched him pray and after about 45 ...
A couple was about to celebrate 50 years together. Their three kids, all very successful and wealthy, agreed to a Sunday dinner in honor of their parents. As usual, they were all late and had varied excuses.“Happy anniversary, Mom and Dad,” gushed son number one. “Sorry, I’m running late… I just didn’t have the time to get you a present.” ...
A bakery owner hires a young female clerk who likes to wear very short skirts and thong panties. One day a young man enters the store, glances at the clerk and at the loaves of bread behind the counter. Noticing her short skirt, and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brilliant idea. “I’d like some raisin bread ...
I was doing yard work after the storm this weekend and my wife was about to take a shower. I realized that I couldn’t find the rake. I yelled up to my wife, “Where’s the rake?” She couldn’t hear me and she shouted back, “What?” I pointed to my eye, then I pointed to my knee and made a raking ...
So after landing my new job as a Walmart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day. About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling bscenities at them all the way throughthe entrance. As I had been instructed, I ...
A bear is chasing a squirrel in the woods. They cross a river when, all of a sudden, the river genie appears. Genie: “Well, alright. Two customers. I don’t know who triggered this whole thing, so lemme give you both 3 wishes. Bear, you start, since you’re bigger.” Bear thinks for a moment. He smiles: “Ok, I want all the ...
A cop waited outside a popular pub hoping to nab a drunk-driver. At closing time, as everyone came out, he spotted his potential quarry. The man was so obviously inebriated that he could barely walk. He stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes looking for his car. After trying his keys on five others, he finally found his ...