Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me yet again, asking why I didn’t do something useful with my time. “Like sitting around the pool and drinking wine is not a good thing?” I asked. Talking about my “doing-something-useful” seems to be her favourite topic of conversation. She was “only thinking of me”, she said and suggested that I go down to the ...
A young couple was making passionate love in the guy’s van (shag carpets, big double mattress in the back… ) when suddenly the girl, being a bit on the kinky side, yells out “Oh big boy, whip me, whip me!” The guy, not wanting to pass up this unique opportunity, obviously did not have any whips on hand, but in ...
The light turned orange, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crossing, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her mobile phone and makeup. ...
An Irish builder employed a young apprentice. His first job was to nail weatherboards onto a shed. The builder showed him how to align, support and nail the board, then turned away to start another job. A half hour later, he returned to see how the apprentice was doing. Some progress had been made but the builder watched as the ...
An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning ’til night she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He ploughed a lot. One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the ...
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. “Hurry!” she said, “stand in the corner.” She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. “Don’t move until I tell you to,” she whispered. “Just pretend you’re a statue.” “What’s this, honey?” the husband inquired ...
Two guys are driving along in a car when they see two dogs mating in someone’s yard. The driver says, “That is great. My wife and I do that every night.” The passenger replies, “My wife is conservative, she likes it the old-fashioned way. But if you tell me how you get your wife to do this, I would like ...
A doctor starts having an affair with a much younger woman. Before too long, she becomes pregnant and they don’t know what to do–they won’t consider abortion and don’t want to put the baby up for adoption. But the doctor’s not going to leave his wife, and the young woman can’t stand the thought of taking care of the child ...