“You’ve got a rare disease and you’ve only got 6 months to live,” the doc tells him. The patient is incredulous and tells the doctor he’s going to get a second opinion. He finds another doctor a few days later and after a battery of tests, this doctor gives him the same bad news. Patient is in shock and asks ...
He is in charge of the copying of holy texts. He notices that all of the monks are copying copies of their sacred texts. He goes to the head monk, “If there is an error in one of the copies, all of the subsequent copies will have the same error.” The head monk replies, “We have been doing it this ...
While driving it off the lot she decides to take it on the highway and really open things up. She hits the speed limit of 70MPH and continues to accelerate 75MPH… 80MPH… … and out of nowhere a siren and the flashing lights of a patrol car come into view of her rear-view mirror. Thinking her new car could easily ...
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?” The bartender considers it, then agrees The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat.He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, ...
“It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger When this becomes apparent, try not to yell at them Some are oversensitive, and there’s nothing worse than an oversensitive woman. My name is Rob Let me relate how I handled ...
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, “My elbow hurts like hell I guess I better see a doctor.” “Listen, you don’t have to spend that kind of money,” Mike replies “There’s a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a urine sample and the computer’ll tell you what’s ...
They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about. For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one ...
He knocks at a young man’s apartment and asks him, “Would you like to buy a top-of-the-line toothbrush? It’s only ten dollars.” “Ten bucks for a toothbrush!” the man yells “What moron would pay ten dollars for a toothbrush? You’re out of your mind.” “All right then,” the salesman continues, “then how about a fresh-baked brownie for a dollar?” The ...