Jake walks into a bar in Wichita, Kansas and as he’s about to order a beer, he notices an enormous jar on the counter. This jar’s stuffed full of $10 bills, so naturally Jake’s intrigued.
“There must be $5,000 in that jar,” Jake says to the bartender. “What’s the deal there?”
“Well,” the bartender responds, “we’ve got a challenge going on right now.”
“What’s the challenge?” asks Jake.
“It’s simple really,” says the bartender. “You put $10 in the jar and if you can then pass three tests, you win the entire contents of the jar. Fail and your money remains in the jar. That way the cash mountain continues to build until someone wins.”
“Wow!” says Jake. “And what are the tests”?
“You’ve got to put your money in the jar first,” says the bartender, “and then I’ll tell you.”
Jake puts a $10 bill in the jar as requested.
“OK,” says the bartender. “So here’s the deal. First, you’ve got to drink a bucket full of pepper tequila. You’ve got to down it in one, without making a face. Second, there’s a vicious Rottweiler outback with a sore tooth. You’ve got to remove that tooth with your bare hands without the use of anaesthetic. Then third, there’s a 90-year-old woman upstairs. She wants someone to make love to her.”
“Jeez!” says Jake. “I’ve paid $10 but I’m not a complete idiot. I’d have to be nuts to take up that challenge.”
“Your call, buddy,” says the bartender, “but your money stays in the jar.”
Jake decides he’ll just have a beer or two by way of consolation and take the $10 loss on the chin.
The beers are going down well and by the end of the evening, Jake’s had a belly-full of beer. He’s had so much beer he’s getting a bit tipsy, to say the least.
And now he’s fully loaded, he’s ready for anything.
“OK buddy,” he says to the bartender, “where’s that tequila?”
The bartender gives him a bucket full of peppered tequila and Jake grabs it with both hands. He raises the bucket to his mouth and downs the entire contents in one. His eyes are watering but he doesn’t make a face.
Jake puts the empty bucket on the bar and then he staggers outside where the vicious Rottweiler is chained to a post in the yard.
The customers in the bar can hear a commotion, the Rottweiler’s barking like crazy and Jake is shouting. The dog then yelps momentarily and this is followed by silence.
A few minutes later, Jake staggers back into the bar, bruised and battered and his shirt is ripped to shreds.
“OK,” he says to the bartender, “now where’s this old woman with the sore tooth.”