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Wrong Timing

These two guys meet after not having seen each other for many, many years.

First guy asks the second guy, “How have things been going?”

The second guy speaking very slowly, tells the first guy,

I…..w…a…s……a…l…m…o…s..t……..m…a…r…r…i…e..d”

The first guy says in amazement, “Hey, you’ve lost your stutter!”

The reply comes,

“Y..e..s, .I….w..e..n..t…..t..o…..a…..d..o..c..t.o..r……a..n..d. . he…… t..o..l..d….. m..e…. t..h..a..t….. i..f….. I…… s..p..e…a..k….. s..l..o..w.l..y…… I …. w..o..u..l..d….. n..o..t…. s..t..u…t..t..e..r.”

The friend congratulates him and then asks about how he was almost married.

“W..e..l..l,….. m..y….. f..i..a..n..c..e..e….a..n..d…….. I…… w..e… r..e….. s..i.t..t..i..n..g…. o..n…..h..e..r……. p..o..r..c..h… a..n…d…. t..h..e… d..o..g… w..a..s.. s…c..r..a..t..c..h..i..n….g…… h..i..s….b..a..c..k….s.o….. I….. t..o..l..d…. h.e..r…… t…h..a.t……w…h..e..n….. w..e…..a..r..e…. m..a..r..r..i..e.d,…….. s..h..e…… c..a .n…… d..o….. t..h..a..t….. f..o..r….. m..e…… a..n..d…..

t..h..e..n…. s.h..e…. t..h..r..e..w……. t..h..e….. r..i..n..g….. i..n….. m..y….. f ..a..c..e”

Why should she throw the ring in your face for that?” asks the friend.

“W..e..l..l, .I…..s..p..e..a..k…..s..o…..s..l..o..w.l..y,…..t..h..a..t… .b. .y…..t..h ..e…… t..i…m…e….. s.h..e….. l..o..o..k..e..d .a..t . t..h..e … .d..o..g,….. h..e . w..a..s…….l..i..c..k..i..n..g .h..i..s ….. b..a..l..l..s.”